Yesterday I started getting abdominal and leg cramps, and the pressure has not really ceased since then. So this body is getting ready! Claire is very active, ready to come out I think. But rather than focus on "when, God, when?" I've decided to say, "Thank you, Father, for Your perfect timing. You know the plans you have for this delivery and for this child, and I thank you for Your deep care for both of us." It's impossible to answer the question, "Are you guys ready?" All we can say is, "we're ready to have our lives transformed, but do we know what we're going? No!" The other night I woke up with the following Scripture in my head, "I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me." I think that will be a lifeline for me, in the inevitable moments when I question my motherhood. With the living God inside of me, what can I fear?
I'm finding that with the increasing unknowns, God is drawing me closer to Himself, and it's wonderful how He always provides grace for the moment. I am so excited to meet Claire Dominica, and for our family to grow. What a gift!
OK, back to Earth :) In terms of our plans for the summer and next year, it looks like Scott will be home more than me finishing his master's and getting his teaching credentials, so I will arrange my work schedule around his class and teaching schedule. I am so blessed to have an understanding boss, willing to give me flexible hours. One of Scott's classes will be daily at lunchtime, so I just might get to have lunch every day with Claire. We shall see... In any case, we both feel strongly that we want to be her primary caretakers - not a daycare or a babysitter. So we'll take it one year at a time... We are also looking forward to moving out further in the country to buy a house and land and raise our 14 children :) I have 2 years left at Washington Theological Union, so it won't be until after that, but our space right now is a tremendous blessing that I don't take for granted, especially after 2 years in the cramped room at WTU.
Well, it's fun to share my thoughts. Feel free to share yours, too.